Balancing Energetics in Conscious Parenting - Supporting The Feminine Essence
Supporting the divine feminine to flow freely.
To incorporate the feminine into our lives more regularly as parents we need to remember two things. One, the feminine is concerned with depth. Two, she wants to be and flow freely.
Depth of feeling. Allow yourself time to feel deeply. Whether it be daily meditation, ecstatic dance, or other chosen embodiment. The goal here is to get out of the mind and into the body. To not allow tough emotions to consume us but to observe and make partnership with them. Of course this can’t always be done in the heat of the moment. Like when you’re cooking supper, the baby is crying, your toddlers pulling on your pant leg to play and you feel as though you could explode… but wait, there’s the depth of this feeling to attend to. So you quietly tend to your toddler,informing them you need a moment and go to sit with that emotion.
Yeah right!
It’s not always feasible in the moment to explore that depth. That’s okay! If you can, put a mental pin in it. When you have a moment later come back to this feeling. Envision the scenario once again calling the smallest details you can to mind. Most importantly, call the feeling to mind. Sit with it. Let it build until it feels all consuming. Notice then where in the body this feeling is coming from. Does it correlate to a specific chakra? What message or need was this emotion communicating? How can you make room for these needs to be met, or change habits/behaviors for future moments?
It’s not an instant fix. You won’t get the message and be able to apply it the next time it resurfaces. But you will have insight into what it is you are being called to change to live more aligned, more yourself. The next time the chaos breaks loose you come back to this inner knowledge you now have about yourself. You know what is needed to amend the inner emotion. Most likely it will come after the moment passes but that’s great! You're getting it! Each time that awareness will come closer to the present moment. This allows us to respond in a way that we choose. Rather than the emotion choosing for us.
The feminine is also very sensual. We can connect with her through simple daily acts of self care. I call them my non-negotiables. The things I do every day to feel good and more myself. One that’s always been in the list, body oiling. Doing a body oiling ritual you grab your favorite oil, be it coconut, jojoba, apricot seed. We begin with our legs. Making long strokes from our feet towards our hips. As we do so, thinking positive thoughts. I find the best way to start this practice is to thank the body areas for their function because not everyone is going to love their legs, stomach, arms right away. But this practice begins to change the thought process around our body. So we thank our legs for their ability to move us through the world. For their strength to stand up for what matters. Whatever positive thing that comes to mind.
We move onto our hips and butt. Rubbing the oil in and again thanking the area for giving us a soft place to rest, for facilitating our ability to move through our legs.
Moving onto the abdomen. We apply the oil and thank it for digesting our food allowing our bodies to absorb all its needed nutrients to keep us healthy and happy. We thank our uterus for its incredible ability to support and grow life. For its ability to give us structure in our days as women (more on that later). It helps us shift from looking at our stomachs as “the problem area” or something that needs to be changed. The sooner we can accept ourselves and our bodies for how we are right now, the easier it will be to initiate meaningful change.
We continue on with our back, as well we can. And finish with our arms. Again making long strokes towards the shoulders and thinking positive thoughts.
Eventually you’ll find, as all who are consistent with this practice do, that you really do love these areas of your body. What’s even greater is that beyond this found sense of body acceptance, we’re also connecting to our sensual side. The more connected we are to our senses the more pleasure we can experience in life. Isn’t that what life’s really about? About experiencing the good feelings while feeling good in our bodies doing it. Sounds like enough to me.
To explore more about your own feminine energetics and how to balance energetics for more intentional parenting, grab a copy of Energetics of Parenting : A New Way of Being in Motherhood.